The Truth~

this post will hurt you i guess~ but at least you know the truth about my feelings~

here's my list of 'im sorry' that i think i was supposed to say to you~

im sorry that i always hurt you without knowing about it~
im sorry that im a "not fun to be with" boyfriend~
im sorry that im not a person that can always be there for you~
im sorry for keeping secrets from you, i know that you hate it~
im sorry coz i dont really know how to cheer you up~
im sorry coz i never knew that im always hurting you~
im sorry coz i never have fun topic to talk to you~
im sorry i never give you the happiness that you always wanted~

syami mengaku yg syami tak reti nak jaga hati wa~ apa yg syami tau nk enjoy life syami~ syami cuba nak jadi "the happy to be with" guy tapi syami tak reti~ sangat2 tak reti~ kadang2 syami taktau nk cakap apa kat wa sebab syami takut wa sakit hati sebab syami *rasanya wa sentiasa sakit hati*~

dulu masa syami kolah lagi, kita kan jarang contact~ seriously, i was so lonely~ kadang2 syami terlupa yg syami ni actually dgn wa~ i just wanted you to be there~ bukannya syami nak paksa wa contact syami sentiasa dulu tapi syami nak wa ada bila syami rasa kurang senang~ my school days were not that cool~ i got no push from my family and i was hoping that you can be the push~

well suma dah lepas~ takleh nk ulang dah pon~ my school life ended like a fairy tail that has no happy ending~ now syami dah nak sambung blaja dah~ syami akn pi lagi jauh dari wa~ im not sure whether im sad or not bout this~ im not even sure about my feelings~ i was alone for so long that im actually used to it~ i dont even think im the old me~ the happy person that i was supposed to be~

im sorry if this post hurts you, im hurting more than you can imagine~ all i wish is you to be happy~ if i cant make you happy, then maybe one day someone will~ wawa, ill try my best~ if i cant, im sorry~ i just dont want you to regret~